she's into porn, im staying here tonight
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
