I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Randomize
