i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
