You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
