she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
