Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
and you said cock pushups were impossible
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Did you just see the Batmobile???
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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