it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize