Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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