Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I just want nice things and good sex
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
