Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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