I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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