How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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