I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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