i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
