I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
