It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
