he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
operation harelip BJ is a go
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
