you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Randomize
