plz talk dirty to me
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
