If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
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