we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
