I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
