he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
