Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Randomize
