She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
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