Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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