There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
If that was your dad, he is hot
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
