So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize
