wat bout pragnant strippers??
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
