You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
