I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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