he shaved USA in his pubs
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Semen is not good for contacts.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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