Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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