Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
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