I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize