Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize