Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
