i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Randomize
