The maid of honor just puked.
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
