Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
