How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
