Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize