you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
