so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
