he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
So many bounce houses so little time
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
