Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Randomize
