I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
