She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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