i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
