I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
